Parenthood offers men a chance to redefine society’s view on manhood. Traditionally, the women are taught to be the caretakers in a family, the softer ones. Even young boys at a tender age are taught two things—physical strength and control, apart from them being primary breadwinners. This was a conclusion of a sociologist who surveyed for his book, ‘Manhood Impossible’ at Albion College.
New-age parents are changing their mindset to accommodate one another in their journey from being a couple to parents. In an ideal world, a father brings in the bread and butter and the mother stays at home, taking care of the needs of the kid/s. But we are evolving to create the new ideal.
There is a small, but fast-growing community of stay-at-home dads, ever since the great recession through the current pandemic. Some were forced into this situation against their will and some happily volunteered. The ones who made this parenting decision voluntarily are the ones who’ve recalibrated their personal definition of manhood.
While making a decision like this, a couple has to take a lot of things into consideration, the financial resources being the primary one, when a father decides to stay at home that usually means having a partner with a better income. The family values play an important role too- whether the parents are in concurrence with the dad to stay at home or not, what kind of impression will their kids grow up with, etc. Also, whether they will get adequate support from friends & family matter quite a lot. All these things when considered help a couple make the right choice which goes well with their eco-system.
Parenting itself can be a very isolating experience and that is why the stay-at-home dads have a very close-knit community and are always welcoming other dads with enthusiasm and understanding. Having a support system is essential, a lot of times it’s very common to feel marginalized or even distrusted by the mom peers.
In a recent interview, Lahar from Mumbai was heard quoting,
Now that my two sons are growing up, I have returned to work. My wife and I balance our personal and professional lives. However, if needed, I would go back and do it in a heartbeat. Watching them sleep for 18 hours a day and grow every instant was a completely different experience!
In the long term, we should make significant shifts in our thought process about work & gender roles. With more women desiring to bring the buck home, it’s better to have an open mind, accept views, and show kindness to fellow parents in the choices they make. One can be surprised just by seeing the difference a supportive partner can make in helping the other parent take the right decision, along with making them feel competent and fulfilled.
We’ve seen cuts across genders in many fields; the fitness industry is seeing a lot of men taking up jogging and aerobics while women want to get into bodybuilding and CrossFit. Hopefully, with kindness and empathy, we hope to see a difference in the cynical society that we currently live in!
Follow @missmalinilifestyle for more such information.