WARNING: The following content may contain cliched Bollywood dialogues some readers may have seen or heard a 1000 times. Reader discretion is advised.
TBH, Bollywood is inspired by real life, so, pretty much every dialogue is perfect for real-life situations. But there are those once-in-a-lifetime, kickass punch lines that definitely would earn you a slow clap, facepalm or one less friend if you deliver it at the right place at the right time. While I’m still struggling to zero in on my favorite dialogue, here are a few that are bound to make you a star at least in your own mind:
Teja Main Hoon, Mark Idhar Hai (Andaz Apna Apna)
For all those times someone can’t take their eyes off your chest, legs or arms while talking to you, make a cross mark on your cheek and redirect their attention to your face by saying the above.
Jaa Simran Jaa… Jee Le Apni Zindagi (Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge)
For all those times you cover up in front of mom and dad for your sibling when they want to get out and party with their friends, make sure to use this line. It also comes in handy when your friend finally moves out of his/her parents’ house… Jaa Simran jaa…jeele apne zindagi
Thappad Se Darr Nahi Lagta Sahab, Pyar Se Lagta Hai (Dabangg)
When your parents start looking for a prospective groom for you and want you to settle down in life, use this in abundance until they either go with it and slap you or give up completely on getting you married. Works all the time (mostly).
Kya Tum Mantally Challenged Ho, My Bwoy? (Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara)
Literally the single most common dialogue that can be used in every context ever. Your friend said no to cheese on nachos? Your friend said Bollywood is too dramatic? Your friend said no to happy hours? All serious cases of ‘Mantally Challenged Bwoys’.
Picture Abhi Baaki Hai Mere Dost (Om Shanti Om)
When someone compliments you on your super amazing dancing skills and you know they’ve not seen half of what you truly are… which is obviously, a star.
Swagat Nahi Karoge Humara? (Dabangg 2)
When you’re finally done with your board exams and come home with an agenda of burning your books. Is there a line more savage AF as the above? I don’t think so.
Mogambo Khush Hua (Mr.India)
When you’ve eaten your way through a 5-course meal and your inner beast is satisfied. Let out a loud or soft burp as per your discretion and proclaim this loudly!
Aaj Khush Toh Bahut Hoge Tum (Deewar)
When you want to say something to that friend who said he/she didn’t study but still tops the class. ‘You too, Brutus?!’ just doesn’t cover it.
Beta, Tumse Na Ho Payega (Gangs Of Wasseypur)
This is less of a dialogue and more of an everyday phrase that you can use to insult your friends. When you’re trying to set up your friend with someone and he/she has no game at all… Voila!
All Is Well (3 Idiots)
Feel free to use this when you’re in a sticky situation, these words can make miracles happen! (Remember the newborn baby that came back to life in 3 idiots?) Stuck in an elevator? All is well. Failed an exam? All is well. Boss screaming at you? All is well should be your motto.
Pushpa, Mujse Ye Aansu Nahi Dekhe Jaate, I Hate Tears (Amar Prem)
Rajesh Khanna has given us some amazing movies and then he gave us this line which is nothing but epic. The line is simple and so is its use, replace your casual ‘Ro mat pagli‘ with ‘Pushpa…I hate tears’ and you’re good to go.
Fun fact: This one’s a Team MissMalini favorite!
Khamosh! (Badla)
So what if no one really remembers the movie Badla? Shatrughan Sinha’s single word dialogue delivery has passed on through the years to become the most used and effective dialogue ever in reel and real life. Every negative troll on the internet ever… Khamosh!
These are the ones that we thought would add the right kind of Bollywood spice to our everyday lives.
Do you have a favorite that you use all the time? Tell us in the comments below!