Is your connection about chemistry or love? How can you actually know, what your bond really stems from? Is it that you are attracted to who they are as a person or is it that you genuinely care about them in ways you don’t even comprehend. Take a look at how you can truly know the difference.
Attracted to them, but do you understand them? You can be attracted to a person’s physical attributes. The way they dress and the way they carry themselves. This attraction can also make you feel that you are really in love with them. The butterflies you feel in your stomach are unexplainable, as no one really knows where they actually come from. However, can you finish his or her sentences? Do you understand how they think and where their reactions come from? If not, your connection is probably more about chemistry and less about a deep connection.
You have things in common but do the things that you don’t have in common bother you? Everyone has different goals. Different things that they want to achieve as individuals. You can have a lot in common like your nature and your day-to-day lifestyle, but the things that don’t add up, do they bother you? If your connection is more about chemistry it WILL bother you. You will want everything to add up because you are fantasizing about what it should be like and not accepting what it really is like. When you love someone the things you do not have in common don’t bother you. You want them to just be the person they truly are and most importantly, you accept them for who they are, flaws and all.
If they were going through a hard time could you really stand by them? If things ‘hit the roof’, if they weren’t the fun loving person you are attracted to, if they changed one day because of something that was going on in their life, would you want to be there? I am not asking you if you WOULD be there, because any normal person with a kind heart would. I am asking you if you would you want to? If it is just chemistry that holds this bond together you will be there but secretly be waiting for them to go back to normal and bounce back from this phase. I know this sounds terrible but you secretly want this phase in their life to end because you do not find it very attractive. If you truly love them, you would want this phase to be over because you can’t see them in pain. You would want to be there the second something goes wrong and you would want to be the person that they turn to. You wouldn’t think, you would just show up.
How deep is your love? This one is a hard one. This is hard because you never actually know how deep any of your connections are. Be it, with a family member, a friend, or a lover, how do you know which relationships are worth fighting for, if you can’t measure them? I guess you don’t really know. It is just something you feel and something you believe in. If it’s real you will just know. The same way somewhere in your heart you will know if it is not. Go with your gut. It speaks volumes to you. Even if you don’t actually want to listen to it.
Which is more important to you? At the end of the day I cannot sit here and tell you which one is more important. It depends on your life goals and what you seek. Some people value high passion and chemistry more than anything else. Some people value friendship and a true bond over everything else. It is really about what you are searching for and what you seek in a relationship.
When it comes to love and chemistry, do you want the easy route that you can have with almost anybody?
Or
Do you want the true intensity that you can only feel with someone specific?
You can read more of my articles on my personal relationship centred blog, Avec Shaz. Do not forget to subscribe to the blog and follow me on Instagram and Facebook as well!