So what’s worse than being friendzoned? Well, hands down, it has to be this…

Source: www.tumblr.com
Source: www.tumblr.com

You have all unfriended at least someone out of your virtual world. And at times, you’ve been at the receiving end of it too (whether you admit it or not!) Often, this is because of some silly chats you’ve had with someone that has thrown a spanner in the works.

Isn’t it irritating to be bothered time and again by a goon in your inbox? On the flip side, you’ve been stalking your crush for weeks and don’t know how to take it up a notch.

The scariest part is a conversation starter, right? They’re like the nervous first dates. You can never be sure if it’ll continue beyond the date. Trust me, your very first chat is equally crucial. It’s somewhat like the ‘Lemon Law’ for the online world! (Hi5 if you got the Barney Stinson reference). Thanks to a few experiences of some of my fellow collegians, I’m here to enlighten you about a few do’s and don’ts for online conversations:

1) Do some R&D.

A little bit of research won’t hurt. By this, I don’t mean stalk her profile right up to 2005, or go crazy liking all her posts; but a little bit of knowledge about her tastes in food, music or her hobbies could help you gather some topics to talk about. This will definitely be useful to jump from small talk and to the next level!

Source: www.tumblr.com
Source: www.tumblr.com

2) Don’t go overboard with the symbols.

So he hasn’t replied to your birthday wishes, festival greetings and even your “hey”. At this juncture, some of us use symbols as our last resort, for example:
– :)))))))
– ??
– !!?
-!?!?!??!??!??

Get what I mean? This is a big NO. This ONLY makes you sound desperate. Just let go and stop obsessing. Remember the universal law:

Source: www.tumblr.com
Source: www.tumblr.com

3) Some wit and humour could go a long way!

Well, this can take some time, effort and practice for some, while it’s almost like basic instinct for others. In either case, being witty and humourous can work wonders to charm your crush! A quality so rare, that if you hone this skill, friend, your life is made!

Source: www.giphy.com
Source: www.giphy.com

4) Don’t ask for their number during the first chat.

If there were criminal charges for things you say while chatting online, this would be number one on that list! Why on earth would you ruin a perfectly smooth first chat by popping this question? Most, if not all of the times, this seems too pushy and intrusive for a first chat. So save it for later!

Source: www.tumblr.com
Source: www.tumblr.com

5) Strike a REAL conversation!

You know how boring some of the random chats are? Talking about each other’s work, studies, friends and stuff like that. If you want to be different and if you REALLY want to have an impact then a REAL conversation in your first chat could help you immensely! You could chat about a recent post of his, or discuss the favourite music band you two have in common; starting off with a discussion topic surely guarantees many more chats to come!

Source: www.giphy.com
Source: www.giphy.com

6) Don’t at ANY COST start with something like this…

‘Hiee I lyk ua dp…..’
Although this is a frequent occurrence for many, I just wanted to emphasize that the odds of her chatting with you further after saying something like this is zilch. Just save yourself the humiliation of being a screenshot forwarded to her girlfriends that turns into a good laugh riot!

Source: www.tumblr.com
Source: www.tumblr.com

7) Go slow and with the flow.

This is the BEST advice for any kind of relationship, virtual or real. In order to sustain a friendship it’s very important to go slow and steady. Remember the world isn’t going to end tomorrow, which means that there’s NO need to rush into things. Enjoy the moment and take one step at a time. (Of course, this mostly applies to the ones who are seriously into somebody.)

Source: www.giphy.com
Source: www.giphy.com

8) Don’t be a nitpicker.

To put it simply, don’t start off with something like ‘positive criticism’ or ‘healthy arguments’ over some silly post of his. You may think that this would get him talking but you’re only digging a hole for yourself! So in all politeness, unless you want to turn him off completely, don’t be a jerk.

Source: www.tumblr.com
Source: www.tumblr.com

*Drumroll*
Congratulations! You’re now ready to make a move on that person you’ve been stalking. No more do you have to rely on liking his or her dp as the only source of communication!

If you’ve had any weird or funny experiences of chatting online that you’d like to share, feel free to mention it in the comment box below!