A recent incident got me thinking about money and its impact on relationships, yes I know, such a first world problem to deal with, but a problem it is! In addition to figuring out work schedules and social media etiquette when you’re in a relationship (yes there is such a thing) AND future goals. Money is now become one of those topics that couples need to have the ‘M’ talk about, and the sooner the better.
Ladies will agree that compared to their male colleagues who hold similar portfolios to them, our salaries are still lower in most cases. But I’m convinced that will change soon. Organizations will have no option but to pay us what we deserve because slowly and steadily the female work force is not only increasing but also proving to be more efficient. In this ecosystem women now have a spending power on par with men; the dynamics of relationships have changed as well. Expensive gifts, fancy dinner dates, weekend getaways. We not only plan and organize them, but also pay for it! And the Men like it!
So what are these ground rules that need to be set when it comes to money? I can only speak from personal experience, so here are a few ground rules that helped me in my relationship that as of today is 2 and half years strong!
1] Decide a spending limits and frequency for dinner dates – Once a week dinner/lunch/brunch date and one night out bar hopping is our golden rule and we go dutch on everything. We both keep a certain amount separate for this.
2] Being completely honest with your partner about your financial situation – I recently chose to invest my money in a couple of portfolios, that meant less disposable income for night outs and dinner dates, telling my partner my plans and showing him the figures helped, because now he was also invested in my financial well-being and will be open to making the necessary life style changes to accommodate them.
3] Setting a saving target as a couple – We have this new thing we just started where we both set a target amount that we have to save. An amount as small as ₹3000 will do the trick. Before you know it, you have enough saved for a spontaneous weekend getaway and you don’t have to worry about money!
4] Identifying each other’s financial Achilles heels and correct it – Mine is spending on friends in bars, his is shopping! Yes you heard me! We know this and are slowly working towards correcting these habits.
5] Investing in a vehicle – This might sound weird, but in a city like Mumbai where privacy is a luxury and travel and night outs are expensive, just having a bike or a car really helps. Your expenses are drastically reduced with this one investment, because now you have the luxury and freedom to enjoy each other’s company on bike rides, or long drives. Ice cream at marine drive or late night andha burjee food runs make for perfect dates.
Share your money mantras with us in the comments below. We would love to know how you balance your cheque book!