131 Thoughts That Went Through Our Heads While Watching Housefull 3!

Team MissMalini decided to watch Housefull 3 together this time because we knew we were going to have just wayyy too many thoughts about this one! The movie stars Akshay Kumar, Jacqueline Fernandez, Riteish Deshmukh, Lisa Haydon, Abhishek Bachchan and Nargis Fakhri. This time it has been directed by Sajid and Farhad.

I personally believe that Housefull 3 is one movie that can’t be reviewed, shouldn’t be reviewed and doesn’t even want to be reviewed. So, instead of a review, here are 150 thoughts (trust me, there were more but it was just too much to take in) that went through our heads.

1. What is this? A historic movie?
2. Itne fake diamonds toh Andaz Apna Apna mein bhi nahi use huye the!
3. Are they stripping?
4. Magic Mike + Housefull. No! Dhoom 1!
5. Why did Nikitin Dheer get such a grand entry music?
6. Hi Tangabali! (What up? Chennai Express reference!)
7. What a plot twist! They show three men in masks. Give them dhamakedar entry. And they’re not the heroes!
8. Obv! All the African Americans are waiters. Where is Sushma Swaraj when you need her?
9. I can’t with these jokes yaar, I’m not even high!
10. Harry, Harsh aur Hulk!
11. (Vijay) Mallya London mein yeh kar raha hai!
12. These girls are British citizens with American accents!
13. “Meri chachi honeymoon se aayi, haemorrhage ho gaya” – this is a dark movie!
14. ‘Naukri neeche’ is ‘calm down’.
15. These agyakari daughters are naughty women, though.
16. That’s what girls do when suppressed so much.
17. Hot toh bohot hain, TBH!
18. *Girls just want to have fun* Cyndi Lauper ko bhi nahi choda.
19. They strip for free food! So would I, but no one wants to see me. :/
20. Dad so rich but still!
21. Listen this can’t work.

1. Lisa, baby you really need to know feminism means… and how to blink!
2. This movie is basically all the lame jokes my parents send me on whatsapp.
3. Is he going to run to the finish line (in a car race)? Isko bolo Grand Prix aise nahi chalta hai!
4. Michael Schumacher ch***ya nahi hai!
5. Abhishek has a rap for himself.
6. Amitji aur Katrina ka cameo! Tom Cruise also.
7. Best part of this movie is Paa ka music! *Pa pa papapa*
8. ‘Teri maa behn’ is the name of the song!
9. Lagaan reference. Oscar bhejo inhe!
10. The bride has no life of her own kya?!
11. ‘Main tere gadhe ko laat marungi’ – ‘I’ll kick his ass’.
12. Housefull is dealing with racism.
13. Surprise! Another racist angle. ‘Indians are only worthy to be our slavesss.’
14. “White little willies!!!”
15. Not joking. I’m sorry I don’t follow. I already think Housefull 1 was a classic.
16. Doctor in French maid uniform!
17. The film makes fun of racism, split personality disorder, depression – but Riteish has a problem with Tanmay Bhat‘s video!
18. Arey Lata Mangeshkar and Sachin Tendulkar are more important yaar!
19. I miss Sajid Khan.
20. She thinks split personality disorder is caused by poverty?
21. It’s the hotel Saif (Ali Khan) and Kareena (Kapoor Khan) stay in when they go to London! #stalker
22. (George) Clooney ka bhi cameo! Kate Winslet also! Clooney ka wax statue is sight for sore eyes!
23. Why do they keep hanging out at Madame Tussaud’s? Vele log wahi hote hai!
24. Brangelina, (Nicole) Kidman, Shah Rukh Khan AND Salman Khan!
25. Why are Brits always so clueless in Bollywood movies?
26. ‘Thandi wali dawa kha lo’ – ‘take a chill pill’!
27. Sly reference to patni (Genelia Deshmukh)!
28. ‘Chalo bahar latke’ – ‘let’s hang out’.

1. Obviously all their servants are black. Obviously.
2. Totes Lagaan times and black slavery times.
3. ‘Kamwali gayi, Kamwali gayi’ – ‘let bygones be bygones’.
4. He’s making these stories up to keep his daughters virgins.
5. I want to leave. This theatre. This world.
6. I want to watch!
7. Aakhri Pasta on London rasta! Chunkyyyy Pandey Akhri Pasta is the main essence of the film! Chunky Pandey is the SRK of Bangladesh.
8. Whatrrrrtf?!
9. ‘Woh mumma nahi banega toh miya kaise milega?” He called their uterus ‘paith ka thaili’ – and Tanmay Bhat is offensive! Maaro in sab ko!
10. But Lisa will agree with these ideologies.
11. Is it just me or does Chunky look like someone punched Arjun Rampal/Farhan Akhtar?
12. Now they’re gonna make fun of disabled people, I can tell. Haan, blind and dumb.
13. How is Pasta speaking such good Hindi?
14. Wait… can I hear people laughing?
15. Obviously. All langda people are bhikaris. Obviously.
16. Akshay Kumar is hot though.
17. I predicted all these jokes!
18. I need to be drunk! I love this film.
19. Now blind jokes. Cool shades Riteish!
20. How dare Riteish tweet about Tanmay?
21. ‘Mere dost mujhe kaanoon bulate hain because main andha hoon’.
22. So Abhishek’s role is only about Bachchan references.
23. This is basically Golmaal ka Tusshar Kapoor on a higher budget. But he doesn’t make those noises like Tusshar thankfully.
24. Why does Jacqueline Fernandez dress like a maid and a school girl?

1. AB Jr is gonna get zyaada screen time just because he will take longest to explain his thoughts.
2. What is ‘maa behen’ and ‘maa ki’ obsession?
3. Excuse me? ‘Pyar ki maa ki pooja karni hai’ is the name of the song?
4. Lots of repressed emotions. Freud ko bulao. Oedipus ko hello bolo! Electra complex bhi.
5. What a sadist this Boman!
6. He’s sabotaging Akshay Kumar’s package! Harassment.
7. What a creeper he has a bag of ants! What if Akshay dies?
8. Never thought I’d get such a close view of Akshays crotch. Not that I mind. Just never thought.
9. Listen. He’s going to die!
10. ‘Suck the ants from my pants!’ Can’t!
11. He’s a deadly dad!
12. Wtf is this movie man?
13. ‘Bandoook ke bachche’ – ‘son of a gun’.
14. OMG! Nargis just broke the fourth wall. Haan Woody Allen ke baad yehi hai!
15. ‘Patthar gulati kar lete hain’ – ‘let’s rock and roll’!
16. His penis has been attacked by ants!

1. No no no. They’ve used Airlift against Akshay Kumar????
2. ‘Jack lean on me’ is my fave joke!
3. She hit his head. She is supposed to be a doctor!
4. They made ‘doodh ki katori’ into a boob reference. My childhood has been ruined.
5. I love Akshay.
6. Jacqueline smiles a lot and then her lips get stuck till she finishes her line.
7. If bikharis had a voice in this country then Akshay would be treated the same way as Tanmay Bhat is being treated right now.
8. Boman’s ring tone is ‘sanedo sanedo’. Obviously!
9. Jackie Shroff bheedo. Jaaaaaackiiiieeeeeeeee. Jackieeeeee. I loveeeee Jaaackiieee!
10. Still hotter than Tiger. Always.
11. So happy Tangabali has found a job.
12. Need a Gujju translator asap. What are they saying? Second half of the movie is now Gujrati.
13. Again clueless Brit! Bechara.
14. How Not To Treat Psychological Disorders 101.
15. Why is he walking like that? Because he’s Sundi? Sundi is what? Some superhero?
16. ‘Akhroat ho kya tum log?’ – ‘Are you guys nuts?’
17. ‘RIP. Rest in pieces.’
18. I have never been taught English so well!
19. ‘ATM’ – ‘aaj tujhe maaroonga’.
20. Boman’s office has the same view as Hrithik Roshan‘s in Mujhse Dosti Karoge. #flashbackfriday
21. So glad Nargis has like four dialogues.
22. Abhishek in this marriage footage is like “I’m married to Ash, bitch. You got nothing on her”!
23. Rs. 5000cr! ‘Papa itna loan khud ke liye nahi lete, desh ke liye lete hain!’
24. Dude, disabled people pe itne jokes.
25. Yaadien Part 2.
26. ‘Kanye is my homie’ – Abhishek’s sweatshirt!
27. DOGGY STYLE. Dogs do susu like this.
28. I love Jacqueline’s legs. Such toned legs, my God. But so much beer wasted!
29. Racist AF! Slept with black girls hence ‘mooh kala kiya’.
30. The three bad guys slept with the black housemaids. And they didn’t know because the girls are black in the dark. Nice. Plus false rape charges. This movie is brilliant. Not offensive at all. Nope!
31. “They were mocking him for being handicapped” – Nargis, umm what are you doing in the movie?
32. Who is this random priest? Who has dubbed for him? He understood Hindi. He’s God!
33. Are they making fun of sad songs? If they are, then this is genius!
34. How can someone make such an offensive movie?
35. So easy to get a wax statue in Madame Tussaud’s. Just date someone who works there.
36. I love Akshay Kumar. I love everything about this movie.
37. You can see the dark circles of unemployment under Dhoom 1‘s eyes
38. Abhishek and Ash!!! Ash and Abhi is true love. *Oh humdum bin tere kya jeena*
39. Nargis ka jumpsuit is same as Kajol‘s dress in DDLJ.

1. “Apne apne maal ke paas jao” #wedontneedfeminism
2. At least call the ambulance for your boyfriends who sacrificed their bums for you!
3. Such mixed emotions – “I can’t stop laughing!”; “What is this movie?”; “I don’t know what to say!”